Obama's Lunch With Mittens

Mitt Romney has been as elusive as Bigfoot since he lost three weeks ago, blurry photos and all. But on Thursday he emerged from the shadows. After six long years of running for president, Romney finally waltzed into the Oval Office to lunch with re-elected President Obama. Over white turkey chili and Southwestern chicken salad, the two former opponents spoke for an hour. According to a press release from the White House, they discussed "America's leadership in the world and the importance of maintaining that leadership position in the future." And, like true frenemies, "they pledged to stay in touch."

It's hard not to read that shiny, happy description from the White House with skepticism. Their lunch was closed to the press—just the two former rivals chit-chatting with no aides present. We don't know what they talked about, but one can use one's imagination. Which Mitt Romney showed up? The old Massachusetts moderate or the bitter loser? Did he tell the president that Obamacare is the end of Western civilization? Did the president, known for his snark, launch any barbs about presenting Romney gifts? Perhaps Romney apologized for falsely centering his campaign's foreign policy on the fictitious claim that Obama had apologized for America? Or, more likely, the two slurped their soup through strained grins, anxiously checking their watches and counting down the minutes until the political photo-op was done with.